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Monday, 27 October 2014

Two More Days

I am going to say it again. TWO MORE DAYS!

"Two more days until what?" You may ask...

Two more days until my mommy gets home!

I cannot wait! I have missed my mother so much. I am used to seeing her all the time and chatting to her about, anything really. We even just sit together and journal. When I stayed away from home for a while I used to call her on the phone all the time. I have had some skype and whatsapp contact with her but it is just not the same.

I am a little apprehensive about Thursday as this is also the day of my first exam and it is at 8 in the morning! I am hardly functioning at that time. But it will make it even more of a treat to see my mom again when I get back home after.

Keep Drinking Tea,

Sunday, 26 October 2014


Hi Guys I hope that everything is going well for you!

To day I want to tell you about NaNoWriMo. This stands for National Novel Writing Month. Okay so I know that it says National but it is actually international and it happens every year.

NaNoWriMo is a competition which is held every year in November. The challenge is to write a 50 000 word novel in the 30 days of November. There are a few actual prizes up for grabs but the actual achievement is how proud of yourself you will be when you have completed a novel. This challenge is aimed at giving people the motivation and community to actually go ahead and write that novel they keep promising themselves that they will write.

I started doing NaNoWriMo last year but I got a little crazy and I stopped going out and stopped interacting with people so I had to stop it. But I am going to try again this year! I have a friend who is going to be doing it as well, so that sorta counts as socializing... doesn't it?
I am going to have to work extra hard because I will have to start 7 days late since my exams only end on the 7th of November. That being said I have already come up with my idea and planned somethings so that will help with the days that I have missed out on.

My sister came up with the title for me. It is called Empty Shoes and Loose Change. And! After she had read some of my ideas and everything she when ahead and photographed a front cover for me!!

   Isn't it wonderful?

I totally encourage you to do NaNoWriMo with me this year! My username is Starfire333 so you can go ahead and add me as a writing buddy!

Keep drinking tea!

P.S. I am on day four of Blogilates Beginners Calendar, still loving it but man is it tough! I can seriously feel the burn. :)

Friday, 24 October 2014


Hello Again;

I am so excited! My sister and I have started Blogilates together. If you have never heard of this before you should totally go and check it out.

So what is Blogilates, well it is all in the name really. Cassey Ho is a Pilates instructor (and a lot more than that too :)) and you can follow her video blogs and posts on her website She calls her works outs "PopPilates". You can find her beginner calendar here. I am really enjoying it so far and I really like her videos. 

Before you ask, no I am not doing this to lose weight. I am actually doing this to build muscle and therefore gain weight. Also I believe that it is just healthy to exercise whether you are trying to lose weight or not. I am naturally skinny at the moment... but once I get older I may not be so lucky so I am going to prepare for that by building healthy habits now.

I hope that you are all doing well,
Keep drinking Tea,

Thursday, 2 October 2014

Canadian Expidition

Hi All,

I am sure that my mother will post some stories from her trip at some point, but I felt that I should just let you you know she, and my father, have left for Canada. They left yesterday and we had some contact with them while they were in the UK.


Friday, 26 September 2014

Yarn Bombing

Hello All,

I am currently working on my second last essay, ever! But I have been reading all day and I need to have a break so I thought I would talk a little about yarn bombing.
ThankYouTree CC BY-SA 3.0
Shrewdcat - Own work
I cannot accurately remember when I first found out about yarn bombing but I have always found it very attractive. Essentially yarn bombing is the act of installing an artwork made of yarn in a public space. It is sort of like graffiti but it is generally considered attractive and it is easy to remove and therefore not considered damaging to public properly. The most common forms that I know of are crochet and knitting yarn bombs.
Here are some examples of what I am talking about:

Apparently an entire town got together and "yarn bombed" their public spaces. You can see pictures here.

And here is a blog by someone who does yarn bombing.

Now here is where I have reached a dilemma. In South Africa, and Cape Town specifically there is a lot of poverty. At night when we are driving places I often pass people who have no houses. I specifically do not say home because I feel that a home is a very personal thing and anything can be a home. But there are many people here who do not have adequate shelter. I see them outside a closed shop sheltering from the rain and wind. There are some terrible news reports, during the cold winter weeks, of people who have died due to the exposure to the cold. Living in a city like this I just feel too bad to do yarn bombing. Although I would likely get no credit for my work and likely not be able to see people appreciating my work, I feel like my time and money would be better spent in crocheting clothes and blankets for the people on the street. We also have numerous orphanages where my donations would be appreciated as well.

I would like to make it clear that I am in no way trying to criticize those people who do participate in yarn bombing, I think that it is a really beautiful art form. But I just feel that personally I would feel happier with myself if I donated my efforts elsewhere.
Anyway, I should be getting back to work now.
Have a good day and keep drinking tea ;)

Sunday, 21 September 2014

A Jolly Chunky bag of my own

Hello all :)

Recently I have been crocheting up a storm as I have been working on new patterns for my shop, xYoopx, and also trying to build up some stock.
Although I do so enjoy making up my own patterns, there is definitely something to be said for following someone-else's pattern too. To day my latest creation was made using a pattern from Attic24. Her blog is LOVELY so you should totally go and check it out. :) The pattern is Jolly Chunky Bag.

So I went out and bought my yarn for this on Friday. I decided to use acrylic yarn as I was not sure how it was going to turn out and I didn't want to spend too much money on something I wasn't going to use. I also decided to change the colours a little-bit to suit me. I still kept the colours in the same order as Lucy, but instead of dark blue I used dark purple (my friends all know my obsession with purple), and instead of medium blue I used a lilac type colour, instead of yellow I used a light green.

I started the base on Friday evening.
On Saturday my man had a hockey tournament so I went to go an support him. For the times when he was not playing I worked on my bag. I finished all but two rows of the actually body of the bag during that time. While I was working a couple of people commented that they had not seen anyone crocheting in a long time. I am always pleased when people say crocheting instead of knitting... because I get that a lot. I also had a couple of people asking me if I sell my work, and a few people asking if I was making a beanie, they were very disappointed that it was a bag not a beanie. At home again I finished the body and started the straps.
To day I finished the straps, made the flowers and leaves and sewed it all together. It was a lovely morning/afternoon. My sister was doing some hand sewing and I was doing my crochet so we got a picnic blanket and sat outside in the sun while we worked. It really was lovely.

And here are some closeups. It was me taking photos here, not my sister, so they are not very good. I was just playing around with the manual focus as you can see. I think that the photos are a bit over exposed.

If you are considering using the pattern I do strongly recommend it. The instructions were easy to follow, plus she tells you how to convert between UK and US stitches. And the bag has turned out wonderfully. I really love it and I am going to be using it as my yarn project bag. Just looking at the bright stripy colours makes me excited.

I hope that you have enjoyed this post.
Keep drinking tea,

Friday, 19 September 2014

What is happening when I don't post...

I haven't posted for quite a while and I found myself asking myself why? Life has interesting twists and turns. Just as Diella and I still enjoy each others company - drink tea; share stories, and do things together - I have been sharing my time with my mother who is going to be 83 years old next month.

Today Diella and I took her out for lunch and she shared with us about her memories of growing up with creative people around her - parents, aunts and uncles. It is an enriching  experience listening to older people, like a mother or grand parent, telling their stories, and experiences that contribute to their wisdom.

It is wonderful to be able to share and connect. If you would like to find out more about your grand parents or parents you could ask them things like:  

Where did you go on holiday?

What did your family like doing together?

Were they creative, sporty, practical, intellectual?

Were they spiritual?

What were the fun things they enjoyed?

You could also let us know of questions you might think of asking.

I have had a great time exploring interests too, over the last four months. Things like learning to play the guitar, taking water colour lessons and writing a story. Life is like a string of beads that continues - whether we acknowledge it or share it or whether we do not - it will continue - and it is better shared.

A warm smile,

Tshirt yarn

Hello again,

Today I am loving my over locker.  I was wanting to cut up some tshirting to make into tshirt yarn when I realised that I could use my over locker! I just set it up without thread and cut away. I find it a lot easier to get a consistent width this way, not to mention that using scissors for that long hurts my hands.

In the past I have bought tshirt yarn premade but I found that it was too expensive and there was not nearly enough. I am finding that cutting up material is much more satisfactory.

I hope that you are having a good day!

Thursday, 18 September 2014

Hello again

Hi again everyone,  it is me, Diella here.

I am sorry to have been AWOL for so long! University has been getting the best of me.

Things that I have been doing:
Crochet, essays, exams, tests, gardening, business planning, seeing friends, studying.

Hopefully I will have time to share lots of exciting things with you soon. I know that Morag, my mom, should be soon. She is going away overseas for a while and I am trying to convince her to blog about it here while she is gone so that we can all keep in touch with her. :)

Keep drinking tea and enjoy the crazy weather here in Cape Town.

Tuesday, 8 July 2014

creative hands

This is what my mother and I have been working on today.
I am working on a crochet blanket that I started last year, and my mother is quilting a bag.

I find it really enjoyable to do hand work with someone else because you can chat at the same time.  We also help each other with choices.

Keep drinking tea!

Sunday, 6 July 2014

Winding up with Wool

Hello Again,

I know that I have been posting a lot recently, and I will continue to do so for the next couple of weeks, but then I shall sadly be gone again when term starts. I start my studies again on the 21st of July.

What I want to talk about today is Wool or Yarn shops. There are a couple of them available in Cape Town, my favourite one is Mamacos in Bergvliet, but yesterday I was looking for some aran yarn that was a natural blend and was not too expensive. I am making my SO a scarf and he always likes things to be at least partly natural. A quick search on the internet reviled that there are more online yarn shops in South Africa than I thought there were. The one that we have decided to try is called Craft&Yarn. I will write up a review on the site and the yarn when I receive it.

The pattern that I probably will be using is this one from Suzanne Resaul. I found it via a pinterest board.

I try not to do too much haberdashery during my holidays because my passion for it tends to spill over into the term time but I could not help myself this time. My mother came to me a few weeks ago and asked me to teach her to crochet so that she could make herself a beanie, and since that I have been asked to teach someone else to crochet. Because of this I have landed up planning lessons, writing up instructions, and crocheting samples of stitches and stitch variations. One thing naturally lead to another and I landed up offering my SO a scarf for this very cold weather we have been having.

Try to keep warm,
Keeping drinking tea,

Saturday, 5 July 2014

first Thursdays

Hi All,

Last Thursday I went to an evening event called First Thursdays. The first Thursday of every month a bunch of the art galleries in Cape Town city bowl are open until 9pm for working people to be able to go and browse. It really was lovely. I went with my SO and some friends. First we went for supper at Gourmet Boerie, which is a restaurant specialising in boerewors rolls. I had the Herbiworse with Lamb sausage.  It was really yummy.

Then we walked around and looked at the art galleries.. it was really fun and I enjoyed looking at the art. Some of it was a bit ridiculous though, like the green square priced at R4,500!!

Outside one of the galleries we even saw a spray painting artist.

Keep  drinking tea,

Wednesday, 2 July 2014


Hello All,

You may be wondering what I have been doing with myself this holiday. A bit of this and a bit of that really, but mainly... Diablo III. As soon as my exams were over and I could afford to lose myself to the world of computer games I ordered the expansion pack Reaper of Souls! Unfortunately the Rand had just been affected that week, I could have bought the expansion pack while I was studying but then I would never study. But the week later when I went to buy it it would cost me an extra R200! Luckily had stock and if I ordered from them the price was still cheaper, only the game needed to be delivered I could not buy the keycode directly from them. So I had to wait. I was very impressed with their delivery speed. (For those not from South Africa, postal services here can be slow.) I ordered it on a Saturday, the Monday was a public holiday so I assumed that they would only post it on the Tuesday but they delivered it on the Tuesday! I finished the new act V that night.

The next day I started a Crusader. I also tried out the Adventure mode a little bit. It has been so much fun. Unfortunately I don't have many friends who play Diablo III so I have been playing on my own but I have still been having a lot of fun.

Okay so now I want to talk a little more about the actual game content and there may be some spoilers. You have been warned. ;) To see the text highlight between the following two stars.

*One of the things that I really like about the expansion is the new in game conversations between your character and your followers. For example there are times when the followers mock computer game conventions. When Myriam comments on your character as been skinny and she says that you do not take care of yourself. Lyndon replies, that he has never seen you eat. I really liked this because I have commonly heard it joked about that you never have to eat or sleep or go to the toilet in these kinds of games. I am not saying that you should, it would just be tedious, but it was funny. 

Another thing that I liked is that the Crusader's responses in conversations tend to be more sarcastic and imply that the player has already played the game and knows what is coming. I found this enjoyable since playing the same acts repeatedly even on different difficulties can get tedious. For example when you find Tyrael is the "star", Tyrael says that he remembers falling and the Crusader responds "Through several floors at least." I found that amusing too.

I really liked Act 5, it lengthened the game a little and although it is quite short the excitement about the game just encouraged me to go and try the Adventure mode. I have not played that much Adventure mode but so far it has been fun. I like that you can just teleport to the different parts of the map, it would be annoying if you had to run all the way there every time even though you weren't playing the campaign. 

I have not got enough Blood shards to really know how the vender works but the two items I have bought have been useless so I need to play around with that a little bit more.*

I will still be playing a lot this holiday so I will post more about Diablo III later in the week as I discover more and play more.

I hope that you enjoyed this post,
Keep drinking tea,

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Baking Butter Biscuits

Baking butter biscuits today! I really love baking but I just don't seem to have time to bake during the term.

These biscuits are lovely and perfect with tea.

here is the recipe:

250g butter
250ml sugar
5ml vanilla essence
3 eggs
250ml cornflour
750ml flour
10ml baking powder
2ml salt

preheat oven to 190°c
Cream the butter and sugar.
Add vanilla essence and eggs.
Sift cornflour, flour, salt and baking powder into the mixture and cut in.
Roll out to 3mm thickness and cut into shapes.
Bake for 10-12 minutes.

This recipe makes roughly 120 biscuits depending in how thick you make them.

Keep drinking tea,

Tuesday, 24 June 2014


Hello Everyone,

This is just a quick post to let you know that I am officially on holiday now. :) So I shall be posting more frequently now.

Keep drinking tea

Thursday, 15 May 2014

Relationships: family members, couples, friends and business partners

Without relationship we are alone and the poorer for it. In my last post, the ebb and flow of relationships , I mentioned how we do go through times of closeness and times of needing space. 

I think of a relationship between different members, (be it family, friends, marriage, or partners, male, female, or two or more people), as having a “life” of its own or being another entity. I rather like to think of it as the "in-between-spaces" of my relationships. It adds another dimension to the relationship almost like a third party. If one considers a mathematics concept: two sets: set A and set B have common qualities that attract them together. They still own their own uniqueness and independence (I will discuss this further at another stage) but the common part where the set intersects is where the relationship is formed. In mathematics this is called a sub-section. It is not the sum of the whole we are talking about here, but the intersection. 

This intersection is where the essence and "life blood" of the relationship is found. Often we may feel that for some unknown reason we are comfortable with someone else. We can't put our finger on it but sub-consciously we match the other or connect in some way. Some say it is attraction or chemistry or something from our past that makes us feel familiar. This is where the intersection starts to grow. We feel it internally. It is intrinsic in nature and its identity has unique qualities that have potential, abilities and peculiarities. 

This “life” is also expressed extrinsically and has potential power, possibilities and immense effects, both for good or harm. The way it is expressed extrinsically or outwardly is through our actions, such as body language, words, behaviors, and our general way of life. Body language can be hand movements, the way we hold our torso or slight facial movements, etc. which are read by others receptors as well meaning or harmful or neutral. I think of these as micro-behaviors. Macro-behaviors are actions such as shouting, laughing, physical activities, statements and patterns we develop. Some times it is more difficult for us to know what is meant by micro behaviors than by macro behaviors. Never-the-less we should always check what is meant and not presume we know. Many a situation is derailed by presumption. The effects, potential power and possibilities are the results of our interactions as humans which can be either for good or for harm.  

The energy of this sub-set begins intrinsically between two people and it is up to them how they want this relationship to develop. They share mutual choice in developing the relationship and expressing  it extrinsically. 
In the next post I discuss: A relationship has a life of its own.

In the mean time enjoy the ebb and flow in the "in-between-spaces" of your relationships.

A warm smile,

The ebb and flow in relationship.

In any relationship there is a natural ebb and flow. Topics seem to arise in an unplanned manner. Diella and I have chats at the most interesting times. It has been colder here with the turning of the season and we have recently had a fireplace fitted into our lounge. So we have been drinking hot drinks by the fire. Sometimes we chat and sometimes we don’t. It depends on our mood at the time. Sometimes we’ll even skirt around each other because we sense the other needs some space. Today we were talking about relationships and how they seem to be different for different couples or people.  Over the next few posts I will be having a look at relationships.

They will be:

  • ·         Relationships: family members, couples, friends and business partners,  

  • ·         A relationship has a life of its own,

  • ·         The Balance in marriage and partnership: examining this life together when things go wrong. 
I am sure there will be many more posts about relationships as my passion is about communication and having good relationships.I'll be back soon.

A warm smile,

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

What's next

Hi all,

I really love writing. It is something which I enjoy so much that it motivated me to start this blog with my mother.

I have so many things that I want to blog about here. I want to do some posts on my art, and how my mother has inspired me and encouraged me as an artist and just as a creative person in general. And I want to do some posts on some of the computer games that I play and how I have experienced them. I may do a little walk through of my favourite one at the moment, Guild Wars 2. My mother and I have even been asked to do a post about tattoos!

But. Unfortunately this is probably the last you'll be hearing from me until sometime in June. I am nearing my busiest time with my studies and then I go into exam period. Thankfully once that is done I will have LOADS of time to blog and to play Guild Wars. :D

Have fun doing what every you do,
Keep positive,
And keep drinking tea ;)


Sunday, 27 April 2014

Diella on Septum piercings

Captive bead ring
Hello again,

Diella here to talk about septum piercings.

This piercing I got when I was 20 years old. This is a funny one, it is actually rather conservative for me but it does seem to get me a lot of attention. Seriously, I can't tell you how many times random people have come up to me in the street or on the bus and asked me questions about it. Two of the most common ones are, "Did it hurt." (duh! All piercings hurt to some extent) and, "Can you still blow your nose with that thing?". (Erm... yes. I can. easily.)

So one day I asked Sheep how he would feel if I got a nose ring. Sheep said that he didn't mind but he would prefer a septum ring. I was aghast, Sheep is usually quite conservative and he is always the one dissuading me from doing something "crazy". And he was happy with a septum ring?! But then when he explained his reasons to me they started to make a lot of sense.

Horseshoe ring

With a horse shoe ring, if you suddenly find yourself in a situation where it was better that you did not have facial piercing, you can just quickly flip it up. These situations for me include meeting friends' grandparents, meeting little children (it seems to freak out my year old cousin for some reason) and that sort of thing. The other advantage is that if you decide to take it out... there is no scar or hole left visible. So this is why I think of it as a conservative piercing rather than a radical one.

Getting pierced. Oh my goodness gracious me. It hurt. A LOT. Like so much so that it is by far the most painful piercing that I have ever had and if it fell out and closed I would NOT do it again. Don't get me wrong I love the piercing it is so pretty, but way too sore. Retrospectively I think that my piercing was done through the cartilage not through the sweet spot, and this could be why it was so painful. It also took 14 months to heal, which is like a personal record for me, if you have read my other posts on piercings you'll know that I tend to heal fast.
On the day I was walking around the mall with Sheep before I went home and I didn't know what to do with myself it was so sore. Sheep kept saying that he thought it was pierced skew (actually my skin had swollen unevenly so it looked skew but a week or so later it went straight again)... I told him that if he touched my face I would kill him. So that was probably an exaggerated threat on my part but seriously I was not in the mood to be messed with.
The first few days were agony. In fact it was about 2 weeks where I was in incredible pain. Luckily I had not yet started university for the year so I did not miss anything. The day after I got it pierced my family and I went to go and see the second Sherlock Holmes movie, and I do not remember a thing. (That reminds me I should probably rewatch it.) Anyway it was just so sore that I could not concentrate on anything. I felt like I was sick. Suddenly I had realised how connected my nose/septum was to everything else. Here is a list of a bunch of things I remember hurting my nose:
Moving my eyebrows, talking, smiling, frowning, laughing, coughing... pretty much everything.

Then after about 2 weeks it started to calm down. It was sill sore if I moved my nose or bumped it but there wasn't the constant pain anymore. But, with healing comes itching. So I would wake up in the middle of the night in agony because I had scratched my nose in my sleep. *sigh* After about a month or two my nose was pretty much painless unless I applied direct pressure to the tip. Although it was only 4 or 5 months before I could flip up my piercing into my nose. Then after about 5 or 6 months I needed to have my wisdom teeth taken out. So I needed to change all my jewelry for bioplast or just take them out, if they were old piercings. Ouch ouch ouch. Changing my septum piercing hurt more than my wisdom operation! (Oh, I can actually do a post on my operation if people want. Comment below.)
Then it was only after 14 months, as I said before, that my nose did not hurt when I applied direct pressure to the tip.
Now it is completely healed. It doesn't hurt, and changing the jewelry is a breeze. :)

Here are some septum jewelry pieces which I love and totally want to buy when I have more money.
Not my photo, click on photo to follow link
Not my photo, click on photo to follow link
Anyway. That is it from me. I hope that you enjoyed this post and found it informative.
Keep drinking tea!


To be updated/ future piercing posts:

Diella on Piercings
Morag on Piercings
General piercing guide
Lobe and Cartilage piercings
Navel Piercing
Septum Piercing  (you are here)

Monday, 21 April 2014

Diella on Navel piercings

Hello There,
Diella here, and as you can see today I am going to be talking about my navel piercing.

I got my navel pierced when I was 18. I had wanted it done for quite a while before that but my parents had both told me that I could not have more piercings until I was 18 and my father was also paranoid about belly rings. My father was utterly convinced, after hearing one of his friends stories about a friend of a friend ect..., that if I got my navel pierced it would get infected and I would die.
In South Africa you become a legally independent adult when you turn 18, so I spoke to my mom and I just decided that once I was 18 my father didn't really have a choice in what I did to my body so I would go and get my navel pierced. I was still at school but obviously my school uniform covered my stomach and no one would need to know about my new piercing.  Since I was 16 I had begun paying for all of my piercings.

The day that I got it done I landed up being quite cheeky... the piercing shop that I was using at that time, Wildfire, was quite far from where I live and I realised that I needed someone to drive me there. My friends, boyfriend, and mother were all busy so that left my father. My father who didn't even want me to get the piercing. So I asked my father to drive me to "x" (the mall which the shop is in, I am not going to name it for securities sake.) Half way there my father suddenly asked, "So what are you doing at "x" anyway?" I replied."Ummm... Shopping."*insert innocent face here* Needless to say my father figured it out later.

My navel piercing did not hurt at all. It was about the same as my lobe piercings, less sore than my cartilage. This piercing also healed really quickly for me. For the first few weeks I put some saline solution in a little shot glass, lent forward and put the glass against my skin and then lay back and let it soak there. For more on how I look after my piercings you can read my post on General piercing Guide. After two months I went for a check up because I had never had a body piercing before and I wanted to make sure that it was doing okay. When I got there they did not want to believe that it was only two months old. That is when I first started to realize that my body heals really quickly. 

I got mine pierced with bioplast, you can see the type of thing I mean in the photo below. And then only once it was fully healed did I start to wear surgical steel jewelry. I would like to get more jewelry than I have although I do have quite a bit at the moment. I mainly have a bunch of coloured balls which I can swap on and off. I also have a couple of "dangly" ones but I don't wear them that much. I am afraid that that will hook on something, and I also find that the weight of them makes my piercing start to hurt. So I only wear my dangly ones for special occasions.

And now I can talk about one of my main reasons for getting this piercing. My tummy. I have always felt quite self conscious of my tummy. I am even a little nervous of putting this photo up. I have a little pale scar on my tummy, I am not sure what it is from, just general playful childhood I suppose. I was not really one of those stay in doors and play with dolls kind of children, more of a climbing up trees and running around kind of child. Anyway I also feel that I have a hairy tummy. I know that my hairs are small and pale and from a distance, like the first photo, you can't really see them. But they have still always bugged me. I may have them because I am skinny, as my sister says, or maybe they are just genetic. I don't know but they do bother me. But since I have had my navel pierced I am much happier with my tummy. I focus on my pretty jewelry instead of my hairs and my scar. Even the other day I took my piercing out for a couple of hours because it was a dangly one and it was hurting me... and I felt naked without my jewelry. It has become a part of me and it has helped me to accept myself as I am.   

Things that I needed to get used to were things like seat belts in cars, this sounds odd but with my height I find that I have to be careful that it does not hook through my t-shirt. Also if I am carrying something heavy I usually lean/hold the bulk of the weight against my body, I have to be careful then that it does not slide down and catch on my piercing. Also some high waisted pants can give me trouble as well. But all of these things have become second nature to me and I subconsciously deal with these things.

I hope that you enjoyed this post.
Keep drinking tea!


To be updated/ future piercing posts:

Diella on Piercings
Morag on Piercings
General piercing guide
Lobe and Cartilage piercings
Navel Piercing (you are here)
Septum Piercing

Wednesday, 16 April 2014

Diella on lobe and cartilage piercings

Hi again,

Diella here. Today I am going to tell you a bit about my experiences of having lobe and cartilage piercings.

I had 5 of my lobe piercings done with a piercing gun, which I would never do now if I could change that. For a long time, the gun has been the standard jewelry shop way of piercing ears and every mommy with her ears pierced used to take her little girl to get them done there. (Yes I know that that is a generalization.But you get my point.) But as I have got older and done more research I have realized that I should have got even my lobes done with a surgical needle by a reputable piercer.
I cannot tell you what exactly is wrong with a piercing gun. I think that the two main problems are that most of the people operating the piercings guns are not actually trained piercers, and the other is that most of the guns are not properly sterilized, if they are sterilized at all.
But what is in the past is in the past and at least I can be thankful that nothing bad happened.

I do not actually know how old I was when I first got my ears pierced, maybe my mother can help here. But I do know that I got my second pair done when I was 11. My mother was okay with it and she took me to get them done. These were also done with a gun.
Then when I was 13 I did something REALLY stupid. I do not advocate this at all, in fact I actively discourage people from doing this. I found a safety pin lying around my house. Without sterilizing it at all or anything, or even cleaning my hands I was just messing about with it. Then I decided to see how hard I could pushing it to my ear until it hurt. It didn't really hurt... and I pierced my ear. Needless to say (excuse the pun) my parents were not impressed. I was told that I was not allowed to get any more piercing until I left school, in this country that is 18. I was extremely lucky that I did not get an infection.  My school did not allow more than one piercing but I somehow got around this by wearing only one in each lobe at a time, and then I just put the others in when I got home. I do remember when I was 13 I had a teacher that scolded me and told me that I was stupid to make so many holes in my ears because I could not possibly know now what I would want when I was an adult. I spoke back to her and got some more snide remarks in return but I can thankfully say that I am still very happy with all my piercings and although I may regret my methods I do not regret the result one bit!
When I was 16 I managed to convince my mother to let me get a third piercing in my right ear to match the third one in my left. This one was also done with a gun.
When I was 17 I did my next stupid thing. It was doubly stupid because it was against my mother and also because it was done incorrectly. My friend was going to get her ears pierced and she asked me to go with her and get something done too as moral support. So I decided to get my right cartilage done. Because we were going to a jewelers they only had the gun there, and neither I nor the girl with the gun knew that it is really not good to get your cartilage done with the gun. they are just not made to do that, and if done wrong they can cause the structural integrity to be compromised. Once again I was super lucky and nothing went wrong with my piercing, I did not get an infection and I did not have any problems with the cartilage. I hid my piercing from my mom and from my school by wearing two plaits.... and then 6 months later I got so very sick of wearing the same hairstyle, so I told my mom that I had disobeyed her. Lucky for me my mother was not too upset and I promised to wait until I was 18 for anymore piercings.
Then finally this year, 22 years old, I did the right thing for my ears and got another cartilage piercing. This time in my left ear and this time with a surgical needle at a reputable piercer. (Wildfire)

I can't remember how long my lobe piercings took to heal but I do remember that cartilage piercings are supposed to take about 9 months to heal. I think that mine actually took about 5-6 months to be fully healed. But I do heal quickly. My current cartilage piercing is 4/5 weeks old and it does not hurt, or bleed, or crust. I am just continuing to clean it because I know that that is the correct thing to do.  I want to get another one in my left again because I don't like symmetry too much. Also I just thing a couple of rings in the cartilage looks pretty.

That is it from me for today.
Keep drinking tea!


To be updated/ future piercing posts:

Diella on Piercings
Morag on Piercings
General piercing guide
Lobe and Cartilage piercings (you are here)
Navel Piercing
Septum Piercing


Sunday, 13 April 2014

The day Diella pierced her own ear (a mother's perspective)

I remember thinking that I had given Diella lots of freedom to pierce at a young age.
"Mom, I want another piercing", she had announced.
"No, I think two sets of holes is enough for now," I answered.

She had also showed interest in piercing her own ear. I had told her not to do it. Then one afternoon I come home to meet Diella in HIGH spirits – In actual fact, it felt like she was on a high. When I found out what she had done I was confused and bewildered by her behavior. She had pierced her own ear with a safety pin! The atmosphere in the home had become charged with emotion (her excitement and my anger). She was 13 years old at the time and as a mother, I felt enraged. 

I didn't know how to handle it and I paced the floor quietly seething. 
“How much more freedom does she need?” I asked myself.

The more important issue in my mind was that she had gone against my expressed wishes. I was also unnerved at the ”high” she was experiencing. I had this notion that, “people hurt themselves to experience an altered state of mind” (not that I knew much about self-harm at the time). I was scared and felt out of control as I wasn’t only worried about septicemia but also what the future might hold if we continued in this direction.  It slowly dawned on me: that “teen-dom” had crept up behind us and was about to flatten us and it was a horrible feeling. 

My reaction when I feel enraged is to withdraw to a place in myself in order to re-group. My concern is that if I don’t do this I might say or do something I will regret. It is my type of damage control. As I withdrew I realized that it is important to consider Diella’s heart and intentions. Apart from asking yourself what the motivation might be; also ask yourself what you both might learn from the situation.

I realized that I needed to be firm about safety issues so I put boundaries in place. How one communicates is important. Acceptance and understanding are things we all look for from others. I needed to be mindful and respectful of Diella’s feelings. Badly expressed anger can cause deep shame in the recipient. This does not build self-esteem. By communicating in respectful manner we teach them how they can respect themselves.

A child's growth.
My overall aim for my children is to develop self-esteem and interdependence. Ihis is a lifelong journey of self-discovery  and growth.They will discover that they are not always in charge of their emotions and actions; this can be quite bewildering to both parent and child as they find their way in mastering their emotions. Somebody once told me that I need to stand firm like a bulwark that weathers the waves crashing against it. While it is challenging to remain calm and self-controlled, as the parent, it is our duty to model the behavior we want to see our children eventually displaying as adults. Maneuvering through the minefields of this journey can bring up some really tricky stuff for parents as we are continually reminded of our own youth.

Keep pondering while you drink your tea.

A warm smile,


My thoughts on piercings: Parenting

This post does not only apply to piercings but to many other situations we land up having to negotiate and navigate when we deal with teens emerging into adulthood. When I was in high school my mother “brushed me off” with excuses about why I couldn’t have piercings. I was quietly compliant until I was 18 years old then I began to manipulate her at her own game (which I won’t go into now).

I have come to the conclusion that we, as parents, should not make up excuses, or frustrate our children due to our own fears or inability to communicate. Boundaries are important and guidance will help develop sound reasoning powers and decision making abilities. Through this post I aim to stimulate your thoughts your boundaries, guidance and manner in which you communicate.

To allow your child freedom of expression (not just outward bodily expression but of their personal thoughts and experiences) is more important than making up excuses.  Ultimately we want our children to make intelligent decisions and possess a healthy self-esteem by the time that they reach adulthood.

How can we encourage personal expression?
·         Listening to them without judgment when they share their experiences; 
        Showing acceptance and understanding for what they are experiencing in their world;
·        remembering that our world, which we come from, is not the same as theirs;
·         Knowing that we might not agree – we should still present our case but we cannot force them to think similarly or agree with us if they honestly don’t.

The more we listen and try to understand their perspective the more they will be encouraged to speak up, share with and express themselves. (This is how our “teas” grew into something special). 

Educate them to educate themselves:
I feel it is important as a teen to be encouraged to
·         be self-reflective;
·          ask pertinent questions;
·          to do research and
·         enter into intelligent discussion with the adult about the issue concerned.  

Parents are often afraid of what their children might find on the internet. There are ways of guarding against that on computer (using apps for "parental control"). You can also think about where you give your child access to computers in the home. But it is also up to us to guide them and teach them how to do research for themselves. You can do this by asking some questions that they need to go and research or getting them think about what questions they would ask.

Support their evaluation process by listening and respectful discussion.

When you evaluate what your child wants to do, as their parent you should ask:
Does it harm them or someone else? Is it disrespectful of another person, themselves or belongings?  Is it fatal? You might have other questions that you feel are important.

It can be disconcerting, at first, when as the adult, you have probably felt in control of your child’s actions or thoughts most of the time. Teenagers herald a “letting go” process for adults. It is uncomfortable but necessary. Just as the teenager is learning to navigate her own life we are learning to let go of the control.

Keep reflecting while you drink your tea,
A warm smile,